To be honest, I think I'd rather have the disease.....

I'm sure you've seen the same commercials as me.

I think it's kind of funny that Big Pharm is actually advertising drugs themselves. Remember when you doctor told you about medicines that he thought could help you? He'd take your condition and history into account and by trial and error, he'd come up with medications to help you with your problems.

Now, every day, we get bombarded with ads for Paxil and Lunesta.

Don't these fuckers have enough money? I mean, do they really need to prey on these folks looking for relief? They plant an idea into their heads that their newest 'wonder drug' can cure up that stubborn liver failure or nervous disorder.

What gets me most of all, however, is the fucking side effects. The first 10 seconds of the commercial tells you what the drug is supposed to cure, and the next 2 minutes tells you all the things that can go wrong.....

Take Lunesta for example. Here's a drug that's supposed to help you sleep, get rest. Well, like lots of people, I have nights where I have trouble sleeping, and you all know (because i bitch about it incessantly) that I usually wake up way too early, but even if I thought it was enough of a problem to try this shit, I think I'd take a pass....

I quote:

Anxiety; decrease in sexual desire; difficulty with coordination; dizziness; drowsiness; dry mouth; headache; indigestion; lightheadedness; nausea; nervousness; unpleasant taste; vomiting.

Now, thiese are the most common side effects. I've bolded a couple I want to talk about. Let's start with drowsiness.

Drowsiness. Really? In a sleep med? Drowsiness better be one of, if not the fucking main effect if I'm taking this shit to sleep.

Nervousness. That's great. Now I'm tired and nervous. I don't know about you, but I can't sleep when I'm nervous.

Vomiting. Yeah, that's helpful. Now, I'm drowsy, nervous, and I'm going to puke. Prolly in my bed, as I'm too drowsy to get to the bathroom. Yeah, I'd be nervous about that.....

Now, we have what the site Drugs.com calls SEVERE side effects. Just so you know, they're the ones that put severe in all caps.

So, things that can occur:

Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; difficulty breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue; unusual hoarseness); aggressive behavior; breast growth; chest pain; confusion; depression; hallucinations; memory problems (such as amnesia); mental or mood changes; painful menstrual periods; seizures; severe mood swings; suicidal thoughts; swelling of hands or feet; symptoms of infection (eg, fever, sore throat, sinus or chest congestion); unusual or disturbing thoughts.

Really? In the commercial, they actually say 'walking, eating and driving while asleep with no memory of events' is a side effect.

What the fuck? I mean really.

If I'm up eating, sleeping or driving, I may be asleep, but I guaran-fucking-tee you I'm not getting rest.

And suicidal thoughts? Let's get real. I may have trouble sleeping, but I'm not about to blow my brains out because of it.

And that's just Lunesta.

A lot of the side effects listed above are pretty mild when compared to those from, say, Lexapro. This little wonder is an anti-depressant. After reading the side effects, I say 'yeah, right.'

The mild:

Constipation; decreased sexual desire or ability; diarrhea; dizziness; drowsiness; dry mouth; headache; increased sweating; lightheadedness when you stand or sit up; loss of appetite; nausea; stomach upset; tiredness; trouble sleeping

The ones I bolded are problematic. How can you be constipated and have diarrhea? Or be tired and drowsy and have trouble sleeping? I fucking swear.

And now, on to the severe ones:

Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; difficulty breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue); bizarre behavior; black or bloody stools; chest pain; confusion; decreased concentration; decreased coordination; fainting; fast or irregular heartbeat; hallucinations; memory loss; menstrual period changes; new or worsening agitation, panic attacks, aggressiveness, impulsiveness, irritability, hostility, exaggerated feeling of well-being, restlessness, or inability to sit still; persistent or severe ringing in the ears;persistent, painful erection; red, swollen, blistered, or peeling skin; seizures; severe or persistent anxiety or trouble sleeping; severe or persistent headache; stomach pain; suicidal thoughts or attempts; tremor; unusual bruising or bleeding; unusual or severe mental or mood changes; unusual weakness; vision changes; worsening of depression

I'm not going to bold and bitch about specifics in there, because I'd be here all day, and this post is already waaaaay too long, but for crying out loud people, this is a fucking anti-depressant. Most of the severe symptoms listed there would depress the most enthusiastic, well adjusted person on the planet, let alone someone who's already fucking depressed.

If you've got a few minutes, head over to Drugs.com and read some of the others. It's a hoot.

Ok, I'm done ranting for today.

Buenos con queso,

T.