Another 'weekend' has come and gone....

And once again, I don't really have much to show for my 2 days off.

I mean I went to Wal-Mart with Pops, and we bought some ink for my printer....

Well, and I played some EQ, and some Civ IV.

The excitement just never stops around here.

Of course, there's one thing looming on the horizon that's got me kinda excited, and I think you all know what that is.

Well, you do if you read here with any regularity. Tho, you'd have to have been here for a year or more to guess.

It's almost vacation time again. A mere 3 weeks or so, and hopefully I'll have some fun stuffs to post about.

As always, I'm looking for guest bloggers for the days I'm gone.

Some of you already have the keys, and are welcome to post (not just while im on vacay but anytime) but I'm making the offer again. If any of y'all regulars wants to put something up while I'm gone (9/16-9/20) leave me a note in the comments, and I'll add you to my contributors list.

Well, I can see from the clock that it's almost time for me to run to the fun....aka go to work, so I'll leave you now.....

Buenos con queso,

T.

And another thing.....

I know that Hollywood loves a good story.

Or a funny story.

Or a tragic story.

Hell, pretty much any kind of story you can come up with to be honest. They say there are no new stories, and for the most part, I think I agree with that, tho there are new ways to tell them.

There's an element of movie storytelling tho that's used a lot, and is completely inaccurate. I mean, there are prolly tons of elements that, strictly speaking are a step away from the reality of what they're supposed to portray, but there's one that's bothered me for a long time now.

You ever seen that movie? You know the one...The comedy (or drama) where Gina (or jane) 'borrows' her grandma's pearl necklace that she's had for like, a billion years, and you just know what's gonna happen? I mean, sometimes it gets caught on her boyfriend's arm, or the bannister of the staircase, but as soon as she takes it out of the jewelry box, you know it's fate is sealed.

Then, it happens...with a slithery rattling bouncy kind of sound, the priceless necklace spews it's load of oyster labor across the floor.

Sometimes, to add to the humor, someone (or many someones) will inadvertently walk/run across them, lose their footing, and plant their keister on the floor. It makes for good comedy, I suppose, but it can't happen.

Any good pearl necklace (especially granny's heirloom) is knotted between every pearl!!! If it breaks, you would lose one, maybe 2 or 3 pearls, and the rest would remain securely on their strand.....

Don't believe me?

Ok fine, but I had one in my hand yesterday.

Granted, not an antique one handcrafted by master artisans for the Tzar's family, but it was made of genuine pearls, and there was as many knots as there were pearls.

Those Hollywood necklaces? Yeah, they're not real pearls, and if they're not real pearls, who gives a fuck?

I mean, really?

Buenos con queso,

T.

I wanna buy Alanis Morisette a dictionary.....

Or at least give her a link to this page.

Now don't get me wrong, I actually like her music, tho as with most artists, I like the stuff that doesn't ever get played better than the stuff that gets totally overplayed.

Simply put, irony is when, in a given statement, the literal meaning is the opposite of the implied meaning.

It's not winning the lottery and dying the next day.

Nor is it 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife.

A traffic jam when you're already late?

Not even fucking close.

Your plane crashing the first time you fly?

Eh, it hints at irony, but by the strictest definition, you should pardon the pun, still falls far short.

Rain on your wedding day?

While all of the things mentioned in her song are unplesant, some even tragic, not a single one of them is ironic.

A no smoking sign on your cigarette break?

What the fuck? How is that ironic? It's inconvenient, but hardly ironic.

Maybe she should have called the song 'Tragic.' Or 'Inconvenient,' but 'Ironic?'

No fuckin' way baby.

Tho, naming a song 'Ironic' and having no instances of irony in it is kinda ironic, dont ya think?

Buenos con queso,

T.

Have you see the new McDonald's commercials?....

You know, the ones where it's being commentated like an Olympic competition.

If not, imagine a blow-by-blow description of a fucking Big Mac being put together.

I know, right?

I mean sure, McD's is a sponsor of the games and all, and that's great, but how do you think the athletes in China feel, having thier accomplishments compared to working in a fast food joint?

I mean really.

Shawn Johnson started training when she was 3 years old. 13 years later, she got a gold medal.

13 fucking years!!

If there's someone that's been with McD's for 13 years and they're still 'burger flipper' then they're just fucking pathetic.

Michael Phelps started swimming at the age of 7, and 16 years later he's accomplished things others only dream of. 8 gold medals in a single Olympics, and currently the athlete with the most Olympic medals ever.

That's just like running the Fry-o-lator. I mean, except for the medals of course. All you get from making fries are grease burns.

Nastia Liukin has been at this forever and if you read that bio page, you'll see that she's had struggles and difficulties that would prolly have sidelined many other athletes.

So yeah, comparing some burger jockey to these superstars just seems wrong to me.

Given most of the people that wait on me at my local McD's I'm thinking it would be more appropriate to compare them to the atlhetes in the Special Olympics, but even those kids have more drive and dedication than the schlubs behind the counter.

Buenos con queso,

T.

Who the fuck is Rosie, and where the fuck are my chili-cheese dogs?

For this blog, we travel back to Monday.

Remember when I posted about Monday, and what a piece of shit it was?

Yeah, I thought so. Here's more on that story.....

I'm not a big fast food eater. It's not because I'm all that health conscious or anything, or that I don't like fast food, it's just that I work on the extreme east edge of town, and there aren't really any ffj (fast food joints) close to me.

Plus, for the money that I spend at most of those places, I could swing by the store and get food to make at home that's, like, 1000 times better.

I do have my weakness tho. In-n-Out's Double Double? Yes Please.

Arby's Roast Beef and Cheddar? I'll take 2.

And then, there's my real obsession. Not very often...like 3 times a month (ok maybe once a week) I get a severe craving for Der Weinerschnitzel's chili-cheese dogs.

I know, right? I'm sure they're just packed with healthy nutrients and vitamins. Or nitrates and cholesterol, but whatever. So Monday, it happens. I'm at work, and I'm starving. Which doesn't happen a lot, because I drink coffee all day at work. I'm at breaking point, with nothing major going on, so I tell my boss I'm gonna run and get some food.

I head to my car, already tasting the sloppy goodness of my lunch. I cruise down the highway, hang a left into DW, and roll to the drive thru. I notice that someone has slapped some stickers on the drive-thru sign for some other restaurant, and I'm planning to tell them when I get to the window....

But I drive up to the menu, and this is what I see.....




I was beyond flabbergasted. I'd heard nothing. No word at all. One day they were there, the next they were just.....gone.




See that clever crown they gave their logo? How conveniently it covers what used to be the 'W'?

Assclowns.

And here's the proof....the proof that they stole my restaurant from me:




I think what bothers me the most, is that I had no warning. I mean hell, the Mexican food might even be good (no i didnt get any i was too pissed). If I had known they were closing, I'd have been there every day, storing up against the long, dogless days to come.

As it stands now, those last 2 (or was it 3) will have to sustain me for who knows how long. I mean there's a DW in Reno, but I'm not really sure where it is, and I'm not gonna drive 30 miles just for some lunch.

Well, not today at any rate.

So, now you know part of my Monday. Don't even ask me what happened when I went to Taco Bell instead. I'll tell you this tho, it didn't improve my mood one iota.....

Buenos con queso,

T.

What's wrong with the radio.....

I've mentioned that I live in a small radio market, and that there are only 4 staions programmed into my car stereo. If you didn't read it before, well, you know it now.

Let me start by saying that I'm a big fan of music. I have been for many years now. I like just about everything (except (c)rap which i dont consider music) tho I admit that sometimes I have to be in the mood to listen to a particular type.

For most of us, the only music we listen to comes from the radio. Now, I know, we have MTV (which doesnt really play music anymore anyhow) and VH1 and the like, but most of us aren't watching t.v. in our car, and when we are watching, it's sitcoms, Jeopardy! or whatever it is you watch.

No, radio is, and has been my primary connection to music for as long as I can remember. I've noticed some trends (some lately some recurring) that are really pissing me off, and I'll now rant about them in no particular order.....

Commericals

Now, this is not to say that I mind commericals on the radio. I don't. I see commericals as little stories that let us have radio for free. If it wasn't for them, all radio would be pay radio like XM and Sirius. No, my problem lies in the fact that they are so unrelentingly fucking stupid.

For crying out loud, given the technical age that we live in, I know that they could make better commericals. Hell, if you fuckers can't figure it out, give me a call. As someone that's really tough to sell to, I can give you ads that are fun, smart, and effective. Stop pandering and condescending to me you assholes!!

Repetition

Now, I know I kind of set myself up for this, as Classic Rock is my chosen genre, and there are only so many bands that can be considered Classisc Rockers, but even the Pap...er Pop station that we listen to at work has a very small rotation of sons that they play.

For instance, I like Led Zeppelin. Alot. In fact, you could prolly go so far as to say that I love them, but I'm sure that they recorded more than 6 fucking songs. I mean, they did release 10 albums, and I'm pretty sure they had at least 2 song on each one.

What I fail to understand, however, is why of the (at least) 80 songs they have, radio stations insist on playing only a handful. I'm to the point now that if I hear Zepp on the radio, I switch the station. Not because I don't like them, but because if I hear 'Stairway to Heaven' one more time, I'm gonna put a fuckin' bullet in my brain.

And it's not just Zepp. Creedence, Steve Miller, AC/DC, Aerosmith, Tom Petty, ZZ Top...and the list goes on. All these band have fairly extensive catalogues, and yet only 5 or 6 of their songs ever get air play.

C'mon guys, play us some new Classic Rock.

Assholes.

General Bullshit and Lies

Again, this may just be my market, but all our stations are competing for the title of 'Longest Time/Most Songs In A Row Commercial Free,' and every single one of them are fucking lying.

I don't care if you call it a 105 minute marathon(105.7), a 103 minute river run (103.7), a 95 minute music block (95.7 sensing a trend here), or even a fucking double shot if you break in at the end of EVERY FUCKING SONG with a station promo, then guess what?

You haven't even played 2 songs in a row you shits. Do you really think that we're so stupid that we've forgotten from one song to the next what station we're listening to? For crying out loud, I've only got 4 programmed, and I know all of them by button, so, please, for my sanity's sake, quit telling me what fucking station I'm listening to 1000 times a day.

Assholes.

/rant off

Ok, so that's mostly it. I'm sure I've forgotten a few things that I should have put in there, and maybe I'll copy that text out and write a real diatribe later, but don't count on it.

Oh, and something else that's pissing me off?

Well, this is kinda long so I'll tell you about that tomorrow....

Buenos con queso,

T.

Some folks just don't have a clue.....

Ok, I may have mentioned that I get some dumbass emails at work.

They come in all shapes and sizes, but mostly can be broken into 3 categories.

1. How much to ship this to country X. When it clearly states in all our items that we DO NOT ship outside the U.S.

2. What's your/Do you have a 'buy it now' price. This is just dumb, because if you know anything about ebay, you know that if there's a buy it now price, it's right below the starting auction price.

3. This I call the 'Really?' email. It usually has to do with somone offering a pathetic amount for one of our store items, which do have a 'make an offer' option. Most times, I can understand. We've got something listed for 50 bux, so you offer 25. That's not really unreasonable, but we'll usually try and get them a little closer to our asking price.

It really depends on the item, how much we have in it, and wether or not we just want to get rid of it. Every once in a while, however we get offers like this:



My response to that: '$226.00? Really?'

Now, the person may have misread the price, or may have mis-entered their offer, but for crying out fucking loud, $226 for a $2600 ring? What are you, fucking stupid?

Anyway, in case you care, here's a link to the actual item: Ring.

On another note, yesterday was mostly a piece of crap. Little things, stupid things, just generally piss me off things all. Day. LONG. I was so frustrated and frazzled by the end of the day I can't even tell you.

Here's hoping today will be better.....

Buenos con queso,

T.

The new woman in my life.....

Well, that's prolly overstating the case, but I'll explain so hold on.

Do you remember a bit ago when I talked about roller derby?

Well, it turns out that one of the girls in my new EverQuest guild is actually on a roller derby team.

Here is a link to her team's site. I also have her as a friend on myspace, but I'm not sure if she wants me to 'out' her or not.I have to say, I like the whole 'This is Spinal Tap' theme they have going on over there.

She's supposed to come by here and start reading, but we'll see.

Satcha (her eq char name) if you're reading this, leave me a comment, or email me at kvenya at gmail dot com and I'll send you a gmail invite so you have a login.

Sigh...time to finish getting ready for work.

Buenos con queso,

T.

Yeah, I get that alot.....

There are certain things in my life I've come to accept.....

My MPV, or the T.J.-vu as it's been known.

Bad Thursdays.

People thinking I'm in a band.

That last one....maybe it's my rock and roll attitude.

Maybe it's the constant air guitar/drumming that I engage in.

Or the fact that I can lip synch like every song on the radio (even the ones i hate and have to listen to cause theyre on the radio at work sigh).

Oh, who am I kiddin....it's my hair:



So, I get it. I mean, I *want* to be a rockstar, just look at me. I even plan on learning how to play guitar.....

Eventually.

I bring it up, because it's similar to another situation that arises with alarming frequency, something that I call ITIKYS.

I'm hoping that name catches on, but for the nonce we'll call it, I Thought I Knew You Syndrome..... This one I really don't understand.

Somtimes it's a simple 'Hi....oh sorry, I thought I knew you.'

I remember once, waaaaay back in the day, I was walking around, and I see these two guys, also walking around. We were on parallel tracks, maybe 40 yards between us, and our paths would never have crossed, but for one thing: One of them looks over at me and yells 'Hey John!'

We're a bit far away for facial recognition, but since that's my name, I start angling of towards them, figuring it's someone I know. As we get closer, I'm thinking that I don't know either of these guys. We get talkin' close, and one of the guys says;

"Sorry, I thought you were my friend named, John.'

'Well, I am named John, that's why I came over.'

'See ya.'

'Yeah.'

And off we go.

Other times, it's worse.

I've carried on entire conversations with people, me trying all the while to figure out who they are, or hoping they'll mention something I remember doing...

And yea...nothin'.

I mean I'm good at it. I know how to listen. I've never had anyone in one of these 'chats' know that I don't know them.

Well, except for that one time.....

That photo walk that Michael and I took when he was here visiting?

Yeah, the one I still haven't posted pix of?

Well, we had just started that walk....Prolly still within 1000 yards of my door or so when this girl yells 'John' out the window of her moving car, and flips into the parking lot of AM/PM.

She pulls up.

We start talkin', I'm looking at her...trying to extrapolate...apply age/divide by beer I've drunk...multply by number of people I know....

And then she says something about 'my surgery,' and I know I gotta end it.

I mean, I was polite, but I explained basically what I typed above, but that I'm not who she thinks I am.

Unless my body's out having surgeries without my knowlege, which I find highly suspect.

Anyhow, just a bit o' funny for a Friday.

Buenos con queso,

T.

Oh oh..Sounds like somebody's got a case of the munn dahys

So here we are again.

It's nice that you've come to see me.

Makes me wish I had more to say.

Today is my Friday (even tho its thursday) and hopefully payday. Sometimes the checks are ready on Thursday, but payday is actually on Friday, so we'll see.

I'm supposed to go to a wedding on Saturday. A friend of mine from High School is tying the knot. It should be cool.

That's about all I've got planned for my weekend, unless you count EQ and beer.

Hope you lives are more exciting than mine.....

Buenos con queso,

T.

I don't really like talking about my flair.....

I know I told y'all about the blood drive, and how I was a good boy and gave them 2 units and all that.

One thing I didn't mention was that T (my manager) also gave everyone (including customers) that donated a free movie...

I won't bore you with the here, gone and back again antics of the movie I wanted, but it popped back up yesterday, and I'm now the proud owner of a copy of Office Space.

I don't know if any of you have see it, but if you haven't, you really should.

In other news, we may have a new visitor soon.

At least we better.

One of my best friends moved to MD recently, and I've been missing her. I understand why she moved, and it was prolly a good thing for her, but I'm still kinda pissed at her.

She called me last night, and we talked for quite a while, and I reminded her about my blog, and told her to get her narrow white ass over here and hang out with me.

So, if you're reading this J (see how i protected your identity there) welcome, and what took you so fucking long?

In other news, this post ie evil.

Evil, you ask, how can a post be evil?

Well, I"m glad you asked. You see, according to my dashboard, this is my 666th post.

So, I guess that's all I have today.....

Buenos con queso,

T.

I'm sitting here trying to come up with something.....

Title...Blog.....Rant....

Something.

I'm sad to say, however, that nothing's presenting itself.

Oh, well, read one of the blogs in the sidebar if you want entertainment today.

Buenos con queso,

T.

Those that do not learn from the past are doomed to repeat it.....

I've come to the following conclusion:

I need to be blessed with wealth beyond my wildest dreams so that I don't have to work anymore.

It's not that I dislike my job, you understand, I just don't want to have to work at all.....

I know I'm no different from y'all in that respect, and you have my well-wishes, as I'm sure I have yours.....

I've been feeling nostalgic lately, and in the vein, going over my old posts.....

Remember this one?

Ok, that's all I got tonight.....

Buenos con queso,

T.

I decided to clean my room today.....

To all but 2 or 3 of you, that statement will seem trivial.

Those of you that really know me, however, will be stunned.

I don't know that it's something I've touched on, but I assure you, it's nothing I'm ashamed of, I'm a total slob.

No, really, I am.

I do my best to keep the rest of the house clean. I put my dishes in the dishwasher, and I try not to leave too much stuff of mine laying around the house, but my room is my room, and it's a mess.

Just ask my mom.

We fought a continual battle while I was growing up. I don't know why I'm not tidy, I just know it's nothing I can change. Every time I clean my room, I start out with the best intentions; I organize as I go, finding a box for important papers, a place for my books & magazines (yes i save all my issues thankyouverymuch) and catalogs (im a freak for them). I separate my laundry into clean and dirty, and even laundry loads.

Even now, with my room 1/2 done, I'm sure most of you would be apalled at the state it's in.

My clean is not your clean.

In my defense, no matter how messy my room becomes, I can, without fail, walk into the 'disaster area' as my mom used to call it, and put my hands on anything I own.

Somewhere along the line, however, something always interrupts me before I'm completely finished. Pops will need a ride to pay the bills, or someone will stop by to hang out and play vids. Whatever the case, I'm usually about 1/2-3/4 done when I get distracted, leaving my project short of completion.

And my room will stay semi-organized for like, a week.

I've never examined the process by which it happens, so I can't ellucidate you, but with no conscious effort on my part, it just re-clutters itself.

That whole 'an organized desk is the sign of insanity' thing, but taken to a level that borders on art.

Well, to me it's art.

To you, it's prolly a just pigsty.

I've taken a break from it, as you can plainly see by the fact that I'm doing this instead of doing that, but I'll get back to it, I promise.

Buenos con queso,

T.

p.s. i changed the photo, not because i miss greg any less, but because it was time. michael and i found that shell casing in the cemetary on our nature walk when he was here. you know, the one i never posted photos from. yeah, that one.....

Flat on my back.....

That's how I spent yesterday (and a fair portion of tuesday as well) because my back decided that it wanted to fuck with me.

I've had a bad back for years, but like 90% of the time, it's not a problem.

I pay attention to how I move, and do my best not to twist my back wrong.

I lift with my legs.

I sit up straight.

I do all the things I'm supposed to, so most of the time it's not an issue. Sometimes tho, my back just decides that it needs to let me know who's really in charge.

I woke up Tuesday, and there was some slight-moderate pain, but nothing I'm not accustomed to. I ate some Bayer Back and Body (the only otc ive found that works) and headed off to work. By noon, I was in so much pain, I had to leave work.

Yesterday, I could barely move. I spent a little time at the computer, but the majority of my day was spent in my bed with The 40-year-old Virgin running in the background while I (re)read a book.

Somewhere during the night, I rolled over and felt something pop back into place.....

And the pain went away.

I would have gone to my chiro, but sadly, he's out of the office on Wednesdays.

So, it's back to work today, but it's my Friday, so in a scant 8 hrs or so, I'll be off for 2 glorious days.

Or something like that.

Buenos con queso,

T.

The cutting irony.....

It was one of those days yesterday.

I know that most of you struggle with Mondays, regardless of your actual work schedule, but those of you that know me, know that my day of trial is actually Thursday.

Yesterday was Thursdayish enough that it's got me worried about my week to come.

My day started (as it always does) with a checking of our store email. There was a message from a gentleman that won an auction ( three 10oz silver bars no less) that haven't arrived yet. His letter (can you call email that) seemed a little strange cause he said when he checked the tracking number on UPS it said the package was out for delivery in Sparks NV.

I was immediatly suspicious, so I went to their website, and sure enough, they're idiots. His order was paid for and shipped on 7/23. On 7/28, they showed an arrival in Hodgkins IL, and on 8/1 it was marked 'out for delivery' in Sparks.

Nevada.

Which is like 30 miles from here.

So, I'm on the phone with UPS. They can't tell me what's up, nor why the package hasn't been delivered. Transfered a couple times, put on hold a couple more, finally got a trace started on the package, but that was how my day started. I hadn't even gotten my work coffee yet.

Shortly after that I went to the bathroom. I don't normally go into that much detail here, but it's central to my story. As I was getting to leave the bathroom, I noticed that there was a flyer taped to the inside of the door promoting our blood drive, which was, like, a week before, so, being the diligent employee that I am, I removed it. As I was wadding it up to throw it away, I felt a jab in my right thumb.

This was the upshot of that. Yes, the flyer for the blood drive formed a corner, and gouged enough flesh out of my thumb to draw blood.

There were a million other little things yesterday but nothing worth posting.

Oh, and since you're going to ask yes, I gave blood. I actually even did the 'we take some out give you your plasma back and take some more' method. By doing it that way, they can get 2 units of blood instead of 1, and since I'm 0- (universal donor) it only makes sense to give as much as I can.

Ok, time for a little surfing before work....

Buenos con queso,

T.

If it wasn't for abuse, I'd get no use at all.....

Well, not really, but that sounded good when I came up with it.

Ok, are you ready for a shocker? I actually did things on my days off this week.

Friday, Sis, D, my niece and I went to see The Dark Knight.....

Damn, it was awesome, and Heath Ledger was as good as you've heard.

I'm not going to put any spoilers here, so if you want someone to ruin the movie for you, you'll have to go elsewhere.

Yesterday (saturday for those of you keeping score at home) D had some free golf passes, so he, Pops, his brother Doc and I played 18. Our tee time was an appallingly early 6:37 a.m., but it actually worked out pretty well.

It was nice and cool, there weren't tons of people on the course, so we didn't get stuck behind people playing slower than us, and I actually had a pretty decent round. Also, given our asscrack of dawn start time, we were done by 10:30 ish. Needless to say, the next event was a nap.

Ok, so there you have it. My weekend laid bare for you to see.

Buenos con queso,

T.