Another Saturday, another movie.....

First off, let me start by saying that I was going to take yesterday off anyway.

Even if I hadn't fucked up the 'post everyday thing' a couple weeks back, Feb 29th was a designated 'day off' from the project.

That being said, on to the review.

In my newly-formed (and rather tenous) tradition of reviewing movies based on video games I've never played, I chose Silent Hill.

Was this movie anything like the video game? I have no idea. Unlike Resident Evil (which as i mentioned i played a bit of a couple of them) I've never even played Silent Hill once.

The movie started out fast. So fast in fact, I was fully prepared to have it be a dream sequence. A screaming mother running through the woods searching for her young daughter as the opening scene just screams this isn't really happening.

Imagine my surprise when it was actually the start of the movie. I like some action at the start of a movie (although i think they overdid it with indiana jones and the temple of doom), and once I realized that it was really the way it started, I began to have some hope.

Sadly, the movie was just ok. Sure, there's plenty of blood and gore (it is a horror movie after all) and some pretty freaky monsters, but it just seems to fall a bit short. The story (again i have no idea how much or how little of it is from the game) is a rather trite take on the whole 'good v. evil' thing, specifically the witch hunts of the early century.

There are some pretty cool special effects, and some interesting cinematics, but the sole highlight of the movie for me was one of the (currently) 3 best horror movie deaths ever.

They are, in no particular order:

Paris Hilton in House of Wax. It's worth watching just to watch her die.

One of the deputies in Slither, which is a surprisingly good horror flick. You should watch it.

Anna in the movie currently under review.

All 3 of them are gory, and all 3 of them leave no question as to wether or not they're actually dead. I can say without reservation that when you see these 3 die, you just know that there's no fucking way in they're going to show up at the end all 'alive by some miracle' shit.

Their tickets get punched, and stay punched.

Ok, so I guess overall, I'd give Silent Hill a 2 out of 5. Two out of five what, you ask? Hell, I don't fuckin' know. 5 anythings. Imagine 5 as the best, and 0 as the worst, and Silent Hill is a 2.

So there you have it, another review done and done.

Now, if you'll excuse me I have to take a call. A Call of Duty.

Buenos con queso,

T.